These last few weeks since going back to work, I have been absoluted staggered by the hectic pace of having two kids with two working parents.

Today was more busy than a typical day, but not by much, basically proceeding like this:

• 5:15am Wake up to Tara crying. Witness Jennifer zombified in bed after having been awakened several times during the night by Tara. Offer to take baby monitor downstairs, on the condition that I’m going to let Tara fuss unless she goes ballistic.

• 5:20am Log on to work and move some projects along while listening to Tara fussing on the baby monitor.

• 5:35am Jennifer comes down and says she’s going to feed Tara because she can still her her crying and therefore can’t sleep.

• 6:35am Stop working and go get Anna out of bed and attempt to quietly get her dressed and ready for school.

• 7:05am Jennifer gets up and takes over Anna while I get ready for work.

• 7:20am Leave for work.

• 7:40am Arrive at work and continue projects.

• 11:30am Meet friend R., who I haven’t seen in a couple months, for lunch.

• 12:30pm Return to work.

• 4:00pm Leave work.

• 4:05pm Arrive at daycare to pick up Tara; discuss eating, sleeping, pooping, and fussiness with M.

• 4:20pm Arrive at preschool to pick up Anna; discuss Anna and Tara with Mrs. T.

• 4:35pm Arrive home. Unpack car of daycare items, sorting out dirty clothes and bottles. Unpack car of preschool items, sorting out reports, artwork, leaves, and stones. Fetch and sort mail. Move Anna’s bicycle from garage to backyard per request, fasten helmet. Change Tara’s diaper.

• 4:45pm Assess contents of refrigerator and pantry. Begin making spanish rice with chicken. Simultaneously prepare Tara’s antibiotics and baby food, Anna’s fish sticks and fruit. Warn Anna to put away whiny voice.

• 5:00pm Put Anna’s dinner on table. Continue preparing adult dinner. Feed medicine and baby food to Tara. Threaten Anna with time-out due to excessive whining.

• 5:05pm Put Anna on time-out due to whining. Continue feeding Tara and preparing food, while also washing dishes.

• 5:07pm Parole Anna from time-out. Repack Tara’s bag for daycare tomorrow.

• 5:15pm Clean up glue Anna has deposited on floor. Place Anna on chair in front of her dinner. Clean up glue Anna has deposited on table. Clean up Tara and place in exersaucer.

• 5:30pm Complete adult dinner prep. Continue washing dishes.

• 5:50pm Greet Jen who has come home from work. Continue cleaning kitchen, packing for day care tomorrow. Make tomorrow’s lunch for Anna. Jen takes Anna upstairs for shower.

• 6:20pm Eat PB&J sandwich for dinner.

• 6:30pm Spend short time with Tara. Get her cleaned up and changed into PJs.

• 6:40pm Get dressed for volleyball.

• 6:45pm Leave for volleyball.

• 7:05pm Warm up and play volleyball.

• 9:30pm Drink lots of water and drive home.

• 9:55pm Arrive home and take shower. Jen has been asleep for over an hour.

• 10:30pm Write blog post, realize I still have to prepare to-do list for tomorrow, bring in Anna’s bike from the backyard. Listen to Tara wake up crying.

• 10:4opm Discuss strategy with Jen for dealing with Tara. Change Tara, listen to more crying.

• 11:00pm Go to sleep.

Note that in all that time I did not actually spend any significant quantity of time with my wife or children. How is this supposed to work?

• 5:30am Wake. Repeat.